Darkness and Light
by kyotoprincess
Summary: The distance is painful for Gilbert but if he's still able to stay by his master's side, it'll be enough for him.


Hohoo! I actually got this idea when I reread some of my poems that I wrote. I personally think this is more on the angst-cute side of it. Like literaly, it focuses on Gilbert's angst. So yeah, its probably going to be categorized or filed as 'Angst'. I hope you like it though. I spent my time writing this.. well not really. First chapter is focused on Gilbert's point of view so don't kill me if I made him _too_ angsty.

* * *

_" Growing in despair, falling slowly and slowly. Times stops. For a moment, everything is still. "_

* * *

Voices echo down the hall. Its decorated with beautiful paintings with precious antique wooden tables at the side. The windows, pure and clear, let the sun come in as it sets over the horizon. But the real action is in the dining room.

Gilbert glares at the stupid girl in front of him. And at some level or not, she is glaring equally as hard as he is at him.

"I _said_, I want meat. Seaweed head." Alice growls back.

"Go eat your leg, stupid rabbit," Gilbert snaps.

Alice reaches for the silverware, but only the knife and fork, as she held it up, readying herself. Gilbert has his gun out already. And its aimed exactly between the idiot girl's forehead. One pull of his finger and she's dead before she could tell. He scoffs because all he ever wanted, ever since he came back, was her to be** dead**. But…

* * *

_" Its hurts. Its painful. It hurts. But he can't stop it. "_

* * *

He pulls back his gun, trudging his feet across the carpet to his seat. The urge was too strong. He picks up his tea and takes a small sip in it. Gilbert decides that if the cannibal wants meat, she had better go find it herself.

He wasn't in the mood today. Chains. _Blood_. And the seal has began to move **again**. Gilbert absolutely despises that seal.

Finally, it was over. Dinner was done and everyone was making their way towards the exit and into their own rooms. Gilbert wanted sleep. Gilbert _needs_ to sleep.

"Gil?"

He turned around and saw him. Oz, his master. Then it only took him a minute to realize that they were alone in the room; everyone had left them to their own business. And Gilbert doesn't like it. Because he knows that Oz is smart. He's smart enough to figure out his behavior. So he wishes that he was in a party, hiding in the background and slipping out.

"Are you okay, Gil?" There is concern laced in his voice.

Almost by instinct, he ruffles the boy's golden locks and smiles. It was forced yet not forced at the same time.

"Yeah, Oz,"

* * *

_" Lying through his teeth, he says that its okay. Time is ticking away for_ that _person. "_

* * *

When he enters the room, its cold and dark. And he likes it. All the curtains are closed, letting little light (even if it is from the moon) come in. Its peaceful and quiet. His hat falls off and his coat is to go, messily draped over the chair in the corner.

His body slumps against the cold sheets and soft pillow. There, he feels calm. There, he feels like crying. Because it hurts to see him in pain. Because he knows that he can't do anything. Because Gilbert knows how far he's getting; whilst he leaves him, he will break. Its so painfully simple.

"Dammit…"

* * *

_" But because of his loyalty; _stubbornness_ Break says. He won't speak a word. And the thin line is still there. "_

* * *

His voice whispers and his heart throbs against his chest. His arms suddenly hurt. So he flips with his back against the bed. He stares into the ceiling. This is how he falls asleep. He stares into the ceiling, thinking about the past. And the memories come flying back, attacking him.

Then he swears that he could cry, he would. But being trained not to cry and the loneliness has blocked his heart. Or at least tries to. Besides, if he wanted to cry, he would've. But… Gilbert wants someone to comfort him. To tell him its alright to cry, especially if his heart was breaking like this. But there's **no one** to tell him that. Not anymore at least.

* * *

_" Every second goes by and he's slowly slipping. Isn't he already falling? No one knows though. who cares? "_

* * *

_Oz… Oz… Oz…._ Oz.

How much does Gilbert love this person? In fact, he doesn't know it himself or why. Gilbert blinks open his eyes even though he fell asleep a couple of minutes ago. He remembers way back from Cheshire's place. What Oz had said about Alice: the sun? Gilbert scoffs, because the only thing Alice was to him was a monster. A chain, even though she _used to be_ human. That was it, wasn't it? She **used to** be human. She** used to** have a choice in life. Now she doesn't.

Part of him is laughing on the inside and part of him is hurt by his thoughts and feelings toward the girl. It wasn't like she _asked_ to be a chain. Gilbert curses himself. No matter what, he won't kill the girl. All for the sake of his master. But… if he doesn't kill her, if he doesn't do anything, isn't he also running? Running from the fact that his master will reject him if he ever knew about these dark, bloodied thoughts.

And the sins, oh the sins he's committed. And he wants to believe that he'll always accept him. He wants to. But he can't. He** just** can't.

* * *

_" Running. He's always running, trying to catch up. Too bad he can't. And it hurts. And its_ painful._ "_

* * *

Light shines upon his face. Gilbert groans and turns away, hiding behind his pillow. His mind is still working though, plotting an easy way to kill Break for opening up his damn curtain in the first place. So his mouth opens, despite being under the pillow, and he is prepared to say a few curse words at him.

"Wakey wakey, Gil~"

The pillow he is using is roughly removed and he is exposed to the bright sunlight. In his attempt to reach for the covers, its also roughly pulled. He groans as he forces himself to open his eyes and look or rather glare at whoever was denying him of his sleep.

Green eyes and a beautiful smile greet him as the light comes in; the birds chirping in the distance. Gilbert thinks it's a illusion because it was beautiful. _Too beautiful_. He blinks back again, pulling his arm against his face as he sits up. He hears his pillows and covers being thrown back on the bed.

"O-Oz?"

He looks back again, wanting to see that beautiful picture again. There it is again, but this time his eyes are closed. It doesn't matter though because that smile is reserved for him. Gilbert could tell. Because it was just like Oz to smile such a happy and carefree smile to erase everything that ever processed in Gilbert's mind.

And its enough to make him smile back.

"Morning Oz, did you sleep well?" His question is serene.

"Hmm yeah. C'mon Gil! We're gonna be late!" Oz tugs on his sleeve, pulling Gilbert up.

Gilbert lets him though. Because in the end, he doesn't really mind. And it makes him feel… happy.

* * *

_" Tick tock. Somehow, _someway_, he sees something down the tunnel. Light, perhaps? He's willing to keep it there._ For now_. "_

* * *

I wrote the poetic lines in a special way. Lets see if you can figure it out ;)


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